Eek, I didn't realise it had been 18 months since my last blog. I felt that all I was doing was moaning so I gave it a bit of a break. As a result I have so much now to fill you all in on. I have now had 6 different treatments in the search for one that will give me both quality of life and some reduction in the cancer.
Currently the breast is totally engorged, with tumour and fluid, to such an amount that the skin has split and there is fluid oozing off. The positive side of this is that they have finally allowed me to see a breast surgeon who has agreed to me having a mastectomy. The timing isn't the best as it is two days before Christmas, he has assured me I will go home on Christmas Eve, but it leaves my poor hubby to have to do Christmas dinner. This is now the third Christmas that has not gone to plan; the first one was my initial diagnosis and the first treatment failing, the second we were supposed to be moving house, unfortunately the chain fell apart several times and we finally moved in March of this year. I was so looking forward to our first Christmas in the new house, it will still be good (as long as I get out of hospital on time) but again not quite what I planned. Ah well there is always next year. At the moment I am in quite a lot of pain with the size of the breast and the broken skin. Hopefully after next week the pain will at least be productive, healing. It does mean that the next lot of chemotherapy will have to be delayed which means that the metastasis in the liver will be untreated for a while. But my logic says that once the primary cancer is gone any treatment will be more effective on the remaining metastasis, maybe later in the year we may be able to consider a liver resection - and remission! I mustn't count my chickens but the fact that they are finally getting rid of the breast makes me feel a little more positive.
So as I said since I last blogged we have moved house, I love where it is and I wish we had been in a position to move much sooner. It has also enabled me to have the puppy I have always wanted, she is a cross between a labrador and a labradoodle, she just looks like a beautiful lab. I have also graduated my foundation degree, although I didn't actually attend my graduation, I wasn't sure where I would be with treatment. One of my fantastic fellow students made me a cap and gown and gave me my very own personal graduation in front of my fellow students at a taught session for our honours year.
Cancer you can do one!! I am a strong woman and a fighter, I will get my remission one day!
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